I love my mother
She gave birth to me
She kept me afterwards
She did her best for me
As a baby
It was instinctive
Genetically hardwired
As a boy
I loved the meals
bandaged boo boo’s
and chances to sleep over at Grandma’s
As a teenager,
It was pretty much lip service only
Had no real frame of reference
And all I cared about was the fun that her rules kept me from having
Typical teen of course
As a man
I now understand
Especially as a parent
Cause only in this capacity
can the depth of sacrifice be truly known
I know what it’s like
to work for idiots,
and have heartburn and headaches because I did not slap the shit out of someone who desperately needed it.
I know the joy of watching a little me light up with joy because she finally mastered tying a shoe
making a peanut butter sandwich,
but not a mess,
and
maintaining cheek weld while working the bolt on a 30-06.
Now I know why she still keeps my report cards and early poems and sports trophies
I even know why she still calls me her baby
Even though I’m her oldest
and damn near 50.
I know a lot now
And I really love her
Not just words
Or pure instinct
Cause I know the pain
and the triumph
and the pride.
And I know
it was through choice and through passion
that she did for me all the things that she did
As a man
and a parent
and also
as a child
I truly do love my mother